Talking About Tragedy

Last night my 3 1/2 year old was in the room when the news came on about the Air France flight that went down over the Atlantic.  Normally I turn the news on when I'm making dinner and most of the time my daughter is not in the room or comes in later in the broadcast when they're talking about health care stories rather than the war in Iraq. 

I know I should shield her from the news but as a former News Producer, watching the news is more than just a hobby, it's part of who I am. Just so we're clear, it's not just television that we expose her to, she also "reads" the daily paper and regularly scans the New Yorker. 

But when the story about an airplane falling out of the sky came on the television the other night I felt really uncomfortable having her hear about it. I guess because I didn't know what to say about it to make her feel OK about it. To make her feel like this couldn't happen to her. I mean when there's  story about a shooting or the war, I explain that those worlds will not affect her, at least not right now. But an airplane she knows. She's been on one and she likes to travel. So how do I explain to her that yes and airplane fell out of the sky but the next airplane she'll be on won't? 

I read in the paper today that there was an 11 year old boy on that flight flying alone. I can't seem to get that image out of my head. He was alone. No one to comfort him. No one he knew at least. I am so haunted by that. 

I know there are ways to talk to children about tragedy. I usually do talk to Scout about what she sees and if it's has upset her. So far she shows no signs of distress from watching the news. She didn't have any questions about the little she saw about the Air France flight. Although I know these things can take time and it might come up one day while getting her hair cut or going to the park. 

Again, I do shield her away from violent news when it's on. I know I should do more. I guess this recent event has sparked me to be a little more aware of what she sees on TV even if I think she's not paying attention. But for me, my question is,  how do you explain something so unexplainable? When I can't wrap my mind around the extreme tragedy of it all, how can I expect her to? And maybe that's the point. This kind of thing just can't be explained.