To Three or Not To Three

 

I have been struggling for months now on whether or not to have a third baby. My head says " No no no you must be crazy!" But my body is saying "Bring it on!"  

I know I'm not the only one struggling with this. I went to drinks with some girlfriends last night and the subject ate up much of the conversation. That and sex. We always end up talking about sex. 

I look at my two beautiful kids and think - why would I want to rock the boat and mess this up? They're healthy, funny, smart and they love each other. Also, I can handle them ... sort of (I still can't manage to take them to the mall or the grocery store but that's another story). But I can handle them. One for each hand. It just works. But then something inside of me just thinks that someone is missing. I just feel like there should be one more out there.

I fear that by going forward with this it might make my life absolute chaos. But then I fear that if I don't at least try I may wonder about "what if" for the rest of my life.

I mean look at Angelina, she's doing it. Yeah, she's got like 18 kids and yeah she's got a nanny to go with each one of them, but she seems to make it work. Why couldn't I?

My mom tells me to absolutely not have any more kids. "Why chance it?" she says. What if something went horribly wrong? "Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it" she says. The 13 year old part of me wants to do it just to prove her wrong. Isn't funny how our mother's can still bring that side of us out?

I wish someone would just say "Go for it, it will be great!" And I would and it would be great. 

Anyone out there have 3 kids? How is it? I would love to know.